“No one knows me, no one ever will. If I don’t say something, if I just lie still.”
Singer and songwriter Milck showed her own vulnerability when sharing these words in her song “Quiet.”
Another line that hits you in the gut: “I can’t keep quiet…a one women riot.”
I want to be that riot. I want to shake down walls and make people realize that the way things are in this world are not always okay.
It is not acceptable for women, or men, to be pushed around like they are property. Obviously as a female, I’ve only experienced how women are treated in public. But that does not mean men are not impacted in a negative manner as well.
Lately, the issues of assault and harassment have been very prevalent in today’s mainstream media. From Harvey Weinstein and Roy Moore to Louis C.K. and Kevin Spacey. Allegations spreading from Hollywood to Capitol Hill.
Sadly, these moments in time aren’t shaking enough for people to realize how much of an issue this really is. It brings attention to the consistently of assaults, yes. It also shows that not everyone is exempt from being cast in a bad light, justified or not. Movements like #MeToo may bring attention to the gravity of these situations, show how often something happens and how hidden the victims (and perpetrators) can be.
I know for myself, I have felt taken advantage of in various ways. I’m lucky enough to have not been hurt physically in a way that makes me want to crawl into a hole and never show my face again. Because that IS how many women and men feel in the aftermath of their assaults.
But I have felt sick to my stomach, I have felt shaky when I think about situations and certain people. And sadly, I recently uncovered memories of being a child and being treated in a way that was purely physical and very manipulative. But when you’re a child, you have no idea what is right versus wrong. Especially when those around you aren’t adults themselves. When the person acting against you is just a cool, older friend that you want to impress.
It seems wrong to feel uncomfortable and taken advantage of in regard to a situation that happened years ago. But the thing is, it happens more often than we think.
Memories resurface years later. Our minds automatically put up walls to shield us from the unpleasant experiences, be it grief or fighting or assault or hurt.
Without us even realizing it, memories begin to fade, because our brain instinctively protects us, until we’re older enough to handle it.
We experience hurt and discomfort on a daily basis. We hide behind walls, friends, family. And that’s ok. It’s ok to deal with things when you’re ready, because until you yourself are prepared to face your own memories, you won’t get the closure or justice you deserve.
Not everyone in this world is bad. Not everyone is untrustworthy or unreliable. There are people in our lives who love you, who will stand by you until the very end.
So, be a riot. Start a conversation, but be respectful. Remember those different from you could also be your army. And never forget that the most important thing is to still love yourself at the end of the day.